Dr. Elyssa Helfer
LMFT, Certified Sex Therapist & Certified Havening Practitioner
I saw a meme that said, "Me to my therapist after she makes me talk about trauma and work through my shit," with a photo underneath of a person leaving the room saying, "Fuck you, and I'll see you next Monday." If that does not describe my style, I don't know what does. Lets face it, while many people initially pick their therapist based on their credentials, they stay for the relationship. So, while there are letters beside my name that I am happy to discuss with you, what matters most is how I will show up for you and how I will create a space for you that I hope can finally move you away from whatever feeling it is that brought you to this page in the first place. Wherever you are right now, you don’t have to do it alone.
My work is grounded in transparency, authenticity, and a fuck ton of humor. I will laugh with you, cry with you, and gently call out the shit that may be keeping you shackled to the things in your life that are no longer serving you. I approach therapy from the perspective that we are all humans, flawed, misunderstood, fucked up, and fundamentally seeking connection and love. I consider myself a modern clinician, constantly evolving and adapting to meet the needs of my clients. My approach may be eclectic, and I am not one to shy away from the occasional (or not so-occasional) curse word, but I am passionate about what I do and believe that quality, honest, and deep work can be life-changing.
Identites I hold: Queer, Fat, Non-monogamous, Kinky.
WHAT I DO
My primary area of expertise is working with issues related to sexuality- primarily kink/BDSM/fetishes. We are living in a world where we are not encouraged to explore our sexuality and innermost desires, and I want to change that. We are constantly stunted and shamed by the societal expectation that sex and love can only exist in one form and are often told that being in monogamous vanilla relationships are the only “right” way to connect. Well, my life’s work is to fight to break that mold both within and outside of the therapy room. Whether exploring Kink/BDSM/Fetishes, Swing Lifestyles, Non-Monogamy in its many forms, Sex Work and more, I am here to help you uncover and embrace your most authentic and aligned self and to help that blossom in an affirming, non-judgemental and empowering way.
INTERESTS
I think the best way to describe me is an extroverted homebody who happens to truly love their work. When I am out of the virtual office, you will typically find me scrolling foodtok for new recipe ideas, reading one of the too many books that I own (mostly faerie smut but no shame here) or spending time with my two rescue pups/children Butters and Winter.
